LIFE AT A GLANCE

someone like you

2011-09-18T11:42:00.001+10:00

"Someone Like You"
by Adele

I heard that you're settled down
That you found a girl and you're married now
I heard that your dreams came true
Guess she gave you things I didn't give to you

Old friend, why are you so shy?
Ain't like you to hold back or hide from the light

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it
I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over

Never mind, I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
Don't forget me, I beg
"I'll remember", you said,
Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead
Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead,
Yeah.

You know how the time flies
Only yesterday it was the time of our lives
We were born and raised
In a summer haze
Bound by the surprise of our glory days

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it
I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over, yeah.

Never mind, I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
Don't forget me, I beg
"I'll remember", you said,
Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead

Nothing compares
No worries or cares
Regrets and mistakes
They are memories made
Who would have known how bittersweet this would taste?

Never mind, I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
Don't forget me, I beg
"I remember", you said,
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead

Never mind, I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
Don't forget me, I beg
"I'll remember", you said,
Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead
Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead

A-Z

2011-09-17T18:12:00.007+10:00

Si A: A, B, C
Si B: What?

Si A: Always Be Careful
Si B: aha then?

Si A: D, E, F, G
Si B: ??

Si A: Don't Ever Forget That
Si B: ForGet That?

Si A: I'm H, I
Si B: What H, I ?

Si A: Happilly Inlove
Si B: so?

Si A: J, K, L, M, Just Keep Loving Me
Si B: hehe and how about N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, Z ?

Si A: No Other Person Quite Reasonable Shall Treat U Very Well Xcept me, You'll Zee (see)
Si B: (smile)

Blood

2011-09-11T22:22:00.004+10:00

A: Hi Mr C*. How are you doing?
B: Hi love. Not too bad (with a big smile)

A: (head nodding) I'm one of the student doctors here. I need to take some blood from you. Alright?
B: My blood? you? No, no no. I want an expert. Believe me, I have terrible vein. You won't get any blood. See (showing his bruised arms)

A: Oh, I see. Hmm, if you don't mind let me have a look first (applying tourniquet to his arm). Pump your hand open and close for me please.
B: Are you sure you want to try? Just once, OK? If you fail, i don't want any blood test today anymore. Deal?

A: I'll try my best Mr C. I can feel your vein here (giving no choice for him to say no)
B: OK, go ahead, be quick. I'm not gonna look.

A: Hey, I can see your blood flowing through the tube (very slow though, only half of FBE tube, should be enough for that. but U&E? CRP? LFT? CMP?
B: It gonna stop,won't be enough for three tubes. Not gonna give you blood (grinning at A)

A: Don't say that, now I'm gonna try moving the needle a bit, please don't move Mr C (arghhhh, no flow, try another vacutainer tube, still no flow)
B: (i told you so)

A: (give up) alright Mr C, I'll take the needle out now.
B: OK. I want my blood back. Don't throw it away! Such a waste (smile to ears)

A few minutes later, a nurse come for another venepuncture.

Moral of the story:
1. Give a try before you say no. Challenge yourself, you might be surprised with the outcome.
2. Believe what your patients say. They know their body best! More than you.
3. Persevere. Be patient. Practice make perfect.
4. Take it easy, be cool even though you lose a bet.
5. You won't be able to say no to the doctor or nurse 'cos they will find a way to convince you.

*Mr C is a 45 year-old schizophrenic man, BIBA to ED with acute dyspnoea, and wheezing. He has a b/g hx of poorly controlled asthma, hepatitis C, 150 pack-year smoking hx and COPD.

a story

2011-08-25T23:40:00.008+10:00

"Behind every person, there is a story. There must be a reason why they are the way they are. So, don't judge, get to know them first!" - Pain & Palliative Care Consultant, Peter MacCallum Cancer Centre

Faith

2011-08-24T17:47:00.007+10:00

Today, I woke up quite early, went to the hospital, spent about two hours doing ward rounds with the palliative care team, clerked a patient and went home with an indescribable feeling.

For some reasons, I kept thinking of what I’ve witnessed during the rounds. Most patients that I saw today have life-threatening illness. They may only have few years to live or months or even weeks. Can you imagine that? What would you do if it happens to you or your loved ones? What would be your reactions?

We know that when people get bad news, they react differently. Some with anger, frustration, denial, crying etc and these are some of the emotions that I captured today.

“What have I done wrong?

“Never start smoking! Look at me now”

"Why me? It's not fair!"

"How can this happen to me?"

“God has punished me, real hard…”

“What could I have done to prevent this from happening?”

“I want to end this, why bother with anything?"

"I can fight this, have some faith and everything will be OK."

As a normal human being, I guess it is absolutely normal to feel any of those feeling. And if we are their carer, how can we respond to their emotion appropriately and sensitively? I have no answer to that….

And one of the patients says:

“I’m not that religious but I have a religion. Believe me, as long as you have a religion, it will make you stronger during your hard times. So, please have one. Have faith. A little faith will make you feel a lot better.”

“Mana Mak..?”

2011-08-22T19:58:00.004+10:00

Mak berdiri di depan pintu. Wajah Mak kelihatan resah. Mak tunggu adik bungsu balik dari sekolah agama.

Ayah baru balik dari sawah.

Ayah tanya Mak, “Along mana?’

Mak jawab, “Ada di dapur tolong siapkan makan.”

Ayah tanya Mak lagi,” Angah mana?”

Mak jawab, “Angah mandi, baru balik main bola.”

Ayah tanya Mak, “Ateh mana?”

Mak jawab, “Ateh, Kak Cik tengok tv dengan Alang di dalam?”

Ayah tanya lagi, “Adik dah balik?”

Mak jawab, “Belum. Patutnya dah balik. Basikal adik rosak kot. Kejap lagi kalau tak balik juga jom kita pergi cari Adik.”

Mak jawab soalan ayah penuh yakin. Tiap-tiap hari ayah tanya soalan yang sama. Mak jawab penuh perhatian. Mak ambil berat di mana anak-anak Mak dan bagaimana keadaan anak-anak Mak setiap masa dan setiap ketika.

Dua puluh tahun kemudian

Jam 6.30 petang

Ayah balik ke rumah. Baju ayah basah. Hujan turun sejak tengahari.

Ayah tanya Along, “Mana Mak?”

Along sedang membelek-belek baju barunya. Along jawab, “Tak tahu.”

Ayah tanya Angah, “Mana Mak?”

Angah menonton tv. Angah jawab, “Mana Angah tahu.”

Ayah tanya Ateh, “Mana Mak?”

Ayah menunggu lama jawapan dari Ateh yang asyik membaca majalah.

Ayah tanya Ateh lagi, “Mana Mak?” Ateh menjawab, “Entah.”

Ateh terus membaca majalah tanpa menoleh kepada Ayah.

Ayah tanya Alang, “Mana Mak?”

Alang tidak jawab. Alang hanya mengoncang bahu tanda tidak tahu.

Ayah tidak mahu tanya Kak Cik dan Adik yang sedang melayan facebook. Ayah tahu yang Ayah tidak akan dapat jawapan yang ayah mahu.

Tidak ada siapa tahu di mana Mak. Tidak ada siapa merasa ingin tahu di mana Mak. Mata dan hati anak-anak Mak tidak pada Mak. Hanya mata dan hati Ayah yang mencari-cari di mana Mak.

Tidak ada anak-anak Mak yang tahu setiap kali ayah bertanya, “Mana Mak?”

Tiba-tiba adik bungsu bersuara, “Mak ni dah senja-senja pun merayap lagi. Tak reti nak balik!!”

Tersentap hati Ayah mendengar kata-kata Adik.

Dulu anak-anak Mak akan berlari mendakap Mak apabila balik dari sekolah. Mereka akan tanya “Mana Mak?” apabila Mak tidak menunggu mereka di depan pintu.

Mereka akan tanya, “Mana Mak.” Apabila dapat nomor 1 atau kaki melecet main bola di padang sekolah. Mak resah apabila anak-anak Mak lambat balik. Mak mahu tahu di mana semua anak-anaknya berada setiap waktu dan setiap ketika.

Sekarang anak-anak sudah besar. Sudah lama anak-anak Mak tidak bertanya ‘Mana Mak?”

Semakin anak-anak Mak besar, soalan “Mana Mak?” semakin hilang dari bibir anak-anak Mak . Ayah berdiri di depan pintu menunggu Mak. Ayah resah menunggu Mak kerana sudah senja sebegini Mak masih belum balik. Ayah risau kerana sejak akhir-akhir ini Mak selalu mengadu sakit lutut.

Dari jauh kelihatan sosok Mak berjalan memakai payung yang sudah uzur. Besi-besi payung tercacak keluar dari kainnya. Hujan masih belum berhenti. Mak menjinjit dua bungkusan plastik. Sudah kebiasaan bagi Mak, Mak akan bawa sesuatu untuk anak-anak Mak apabila pulang dari berjalan.

Sampai di halaman rumah Mak berhenti di depan deretan kereta anak-anak Mak. Mak buangkan daun-daun yang mengotori kereta anak-anak Mak. Mak usap bahagian depan kereta Ateh perlahan-lahan. Mak rasakan seperti mengusap kepala Ateh waktu Ateh kecil. Mak senyum. Kedua bibir Mak diketap repat. Senyum tertahan, hanya Ayah yang faham. Sekarang Mak tidak dapat lagi merasa mengusap kepala anak-anak seperti masa anak-anak Mak kecil dulu. Mereka sudah besar. Mak takut anak Mak akan menepis tangan Mak kalau Mak lakukannya.

Lima buah kereta milik anak-anak Mak berdiri megah. Kereta Ateh paling gah. Mak tidak tahu pun apa kehebatan kereta Ateh itu. Mak cuma suka warnanya. Kereta warna merah bata, warna kesukaan Mak. Mak belum merasa naik kereta anak Mak yang ini.

Baju mak basah kena hujan. Ayah tutupkan payung mak. Mak bagi salam. Salam Mak tidak berjawab. Terketar-ketar lutut Mak melangkah anak tangga. Ayah pimpin Mak masuk ke rumah. Lutut Mak sakit lagi.

Mak letakkan bungkusan di atas meja. Sebungkus rebung dan sebungkus kueh koci pemberian Mak Uda untuk anak-anak Mak. Mak Uda tahu anak-anak Mak suka makan kueh koci dan Mak malu untuk meminta untuk bawa balik. Namun raut wajah Mak sudah cukup membuat Mak Uda faham.

Semasa menerima bungkusan kueh koci dari Mak Uda tadi, Mak sempat berkata kepada Mak Uda, “Wah berebutlah budak-budak tu nanti nampak kueh koci kamu ni.”

Sekurang-kurangnya itulah bayangan Mak. Mak bayangkan anak-anak Mak sedang gembira menikmati kueh koci sebagimana masa anak-anak Mak kecil dulu. Mereka berebut dan Mak jadi hakim pembuat keputusan muktamat. Sering kali Mak akan beri bahagian Mak supaya anak-anak Mak puas makan. Bayangan itu sering singgah di kepala Mak.

Ayah suruh Mak tukar baju yang basah itu. Mak akur.

Selepas Mak tukar baju, Ayah iring Mak ke dapur. Mak ajak anak-anak Mak makan kueh koci. Tidak seorang pun yang menoleh kepada Mak. Mata dan hati anak-anak Mak sudah bukan pada Mak lagi.

Mak hanya tunduk, akur dengan keadaan.

Ayah tahu Mak sudah tidak boleh mengharapkan anak-anak melompat-lompat gembira dan berlari mendakapnya seperti dulu.

Ayah temankan Mak makan. Mak menyuap nasi perlahan-lahan, masih mengharapkan anak-anak Mak akan makan bersama. Setiap hari Mak berharap begitu. Hanya Ayah yang duduk bersama Mak di meja makan setiap malam.

Ayah tahu Mak penat sebab berjalan jauh. Siang tadi Mak pergi ke rumah Mak Uda di kampung seberang untuk mencari rebung. Mak hendak masak rebung masak lemak cili api dengan ikan masin kesukaan anak-anak Mak.

Ayah tanya Mak kenapa Mak tidak telepon suruh anak-anak jemput. Mak jawab, “Saya dah suruh Uda telepon budak-budak ni tadi. Tapi Uda kata semua tak berangkat.”

Mak minta Mak Uda telepon anak-anak yang Mak tidak boleh berjalan balik sebab hujan. Lutut Mak akan sakit kalau sejuk. Ada sedikit harapan di hati Mak agar salah seorang anak Mak akan menjemput Mak dengan kereta. Mak teringin kalau Ateh yang datang menjemput Mak dengan kereta barunya. Tidak ada siapa yang datang jemput Mak.

Mak tahu anak-anak mak tidak sedar telepon berbunyi. Mak ingat kata-kata ayah, “Kita tak usah susahkan anak-anak. Selagi kita mampu kita buat saja sendiri apa-apa pun. Mereka ada kehidupan masing-masing. Tak payah sedih-sedih. Maafkan sajalah anak-anak kita. Tak apalah kalau tak merasa menaiki kereta mereka sekarang. Nanti kalau kita mati kita masih ada peluang merasa anak-anak mengangkat kita kat bahu mereka.” Mak faham buah hati Mak semua sudah besar. Along dan Angah sudah beristeri. Ateh, Alang, Kak Cik dan Adik masing-masing sudah punya buah hati sendiri yang sudah mengambil tempat Mak di hati anak-anak Mak.

Pada suapan terakhir, setitik air mata Mak jatuh ke pinggan.

Kueh koci masih belum diusik oleh anak-anak Mak.

Beberapa tahun kemudian

Mak Uda tanya Along, Angah, Ateh, Alang, Kak Cik dan Adik, “Mana mak?”.

Hanya Adik yang jawab, “Mak dah tak ada.”

Along, Angah, Ateh, Alang, Kak Cik dan Adik tidak sempat melihat Mak waktu Mak sakit.

Kini Mak sudah berada di sisi Tuhannya bukan di sisi anak-anak Mak lagi.

Dalam isakan tangis, Along, Angah, Ateh, Alang, Kak Cik dan Adik menerpa kubur Mak. Hanya batu nisan yang berdiri terpacak. Batu nisan Mak tidak boleh bersuara. Batu nisan tidak ada tangan macam tangan Mak yang selalu memeluk erat anak-anaknya apabila anak-anak datang menerpa Mak semasa anak-anak Mak kecil dulu.

Mak pergi semasa Along, Angah, Ateh, Alang, Kak Cik dan Adik berada jauh di bandar. Kata Along, Angah, Ateh, Alang, Kak Cik dan Adik mereka tidak dengar handphone berbunyi semasa ayah telepon untuk beritahu mak sakit tenat.

Mak faham, mata dan telinga anak-anak Mak adalah untuk orang lain bukan untuk Mak.

Hati anak-anak Mak bukan milik Mak lagi. Hanya hati Mak yang tidak pernah diberikan kepada sesiapa, hanya untuk anak-anak Mak..

Mak tidak sempat merasa diangkat di atas bahu anak-anak Mak. Hanya bahu ayah yang sempat mengangkat jenazah Mak dalam hujan renyai.

Ayah sedih sebab tiada lagi suara Mak yang akan menjawab soalan Ayah,

“Mana Along?” , “Mana Angah?”, “Mana Ateh?”, “Mana Alang?”, “Mana Kak Cik?” atau “Mana Adik?”. Hanya Mak saja yang rajin menjawab soalan ayah itu dan jawapan Mak memang tidak pernah silap. Mak sentiasa yakin dengan jawapannya sebab mak ambil tahu di mana anak-anaknya berada pada setiap waktu dan setiap ketika. Anak-anak Mak sentiasa di hati Mak tetapi hati anak-anak Mak ada orang lain yang mengisinya.

Ayah sedih. Di tepi kubur Mak, Ayah bermonolog sendiri, “Mulai hari ini tidak perlu bertanya lagi kepada Along, Angah, Ateh, Alang, Kak Cik dan Adik , “Mana mak?” ”

Kereta merah Ateh bergerak perlahan membawa Ayah pulang. Along, Angah, Alang dan Adik mengikut dari belakang. Hati ayah hancur teringat hajat Mak untuk naik kereta merah Ateh tidak kesampaian. Ayah terbayang kata-kata Mak malam itu, “Cantiknya kereta Ateh, kan Bang? Besok-besok Ateh bawalah kita jalan-jalan kat Kuala Lumpur tu. Saya akan buat kueh koci buat bekal.”

“Ayah, ayah….bangun.” Suara Ateh memanggil ayah. Ayah pengsan sewaktu turun dari kereta Ateh..

Terketar-ketar ayah bersuara, “Mana Mak?”

Ayah tidak mampu berhenti menanya soalan itu. Sudah 10 tahun Mak pergi namun soalan “Mana Mak?” masih sering keluar dari mulut Ayah sehingga ke akhir usia.

Sebuah cerita pendek buat tatapan anak-anak yang kadang-kadang lupa persaaan ibu. Kata orang hidup seorang ibu waktu muda dilambung resah, apabila tua dilambung rasa. Kata Rasulullah saw. ibu 3 kali lebih utama dari ayah. Bayangkanlah berapa kali ibu lebih utama dari isteri, pekerjaan dan anak-anak sebenarnya. Solat sunat pun Allah suruh berhenti apabila ibu memanggil. Berapa kerapkah kita membiarkan deringan telepon panggilan dari ibu tanpa berjawab?

cerita asal >> http://www.tokesah.com/2011/08/mana-mak/

why?

2011-08-19T14:41:00.012+10:00

Hello! Hello! Hello! Is anybody out there? I'm going to be very frank here. I’ve to say, I’ve nearly forgotten about this blog, until last night. I received an email at 11.42pm notifying me that someone has posted a comment on my last entry. The comment goes like this “when will you post again? Been looking forward to this!”

Then, I clicked the link to view it on my blog, lo and behold, it was gone! 0 comment, in split seconds. It takes only seconds for her/him to realise the mistake, haha.

Anyway, thanks to this anonymous (^_^) for the wake-up call even though it might not meant for me. Today, I’ve decided to write my first entry for 2011. I’d like to share a story with you. A real story.

As scheduled in my timetable, I attended a CDAMS clinic in *** hospital. That day, I got the opportunity to sit with a psychiatrist. There was a middle-aged man who has been referred by his GP to have his cognition and memory tested.

What I want to share here is some pieces of his opinion about the world. He has many negative thoughts of almost everything - including the Gillard’s government, health system, just name it. But the one that concerned him most is “us”.

“I’m most worried about Muslim community in our country, more than anything! No offence to you young lady. As far as we know, everyone is welcome to Australia, either to work, to study or etc. But, day by day, the Muslim community has becoming larger and larger. And one day, they will take over our country!”

I was struck by this!

Why are non-Muslims afraid of Muslims? of Islam? They know from the fact that, Muslim population is growing and to date, there are 1.6 billion believers all over the world.

And I wonder why non-Muslims do believe that “we” can conquer the world and poise to become the planet’s largest majority? That’s interesting, isn’t it?

Why aren’t they concerned about the surging population of other religions of Vietnamese, Koreans, Sri Lankans, and Chinese?

So, there's something for us to ponder.

never shout never!

2010-09-04T15:18:00.004+10:00

ON THE BRIGHTSIDE

by: NEVER SHOUT NEVER

I met a man of two feet tall

This man was quite ambitious

In a world that is so vicious

To us all, I said "hi"

As he replied, he said

"Listen to these words that I have lived by my whole life."

You're only as tall

As your heart will let you be

And your only as small

As the world will make you seem

And when the going gets rough

And you feel like you may fall

Just look on the bright side

You're roughly six feet tall

I met a man of twelve feet tall

He towered like a giant

In a world that was defiant of his height

I said "hi" as he replied, he said

"Listen to these words that I have dreaded my whole life."

You're only as tall

As your heart will let you be

And your only as small

As the world will make you seem

And when the going gets rough

And you feel like you may fall

Just look on the bright side

You're roughly six feet tall

I am a man of six feet tall

Just looking for some answers

In a world that answers none

Of them at all

I'll say "hi"

But not reply to the letters that you write

Because I found some piece of mind

Cause I'm only as tall

As my heart will let me be

And I'm only as small

As the world will make me seem

When the going gets rough

And I feel like I may fall

I'll look on the brightside

I'm roughly six feet tall

a story to tell

2010-08-29T20:24:00.011+10:00

http://nayzak.deviantart.com/

till death do us apart

2010-08-27T15:30:00.009+10:00

This story has brought tears to my eyes. Very touching~! It's a very good reminder for those who has been married or soon-to-be married. As for me, though I'm not married and not even soon-to-be married, I did learn something from it.

Author: Stephen Hamilton Brown

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her! With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.

She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now. The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage. This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.

She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request. I told Jane about my wife's divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily. Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out.

To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.

I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.

My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the divorce.-- At least, in the eyes of our son--- I'm a loving husband....

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

ku ada kamu

2010-05-25T00:49:00.004+10:00

KU ADA KAMU
by: Adira AF8

Di kala ku kehilangan
Di dalam kegelapan
Kau suluhkan sinar petunjuk
Di kala ku kesedihan
Kau ukirkan senyuman

Dengan penuh sabar memujuk
Engkau menyambut tiap kali aku terjatuh
Seandainya hari esok runtuhnya langit dijunjung
Tabahlah menjunjung bersamaku
Seandainya hari esok dunia dilanda gelora
Takkan ku gemuruh selagi ku ada kamu

Di kala aku tak pasti
Kau tampil dengan berani
Membimbing agar lebih yakin
Dan bila hidup penuh soalan
Kau berikan jawapan
Melengkap semua kekurangan

Engkau menyambut tiap kali aku terjatuh
Tidak mungkin diri ini mampu hidup tanpa doronganmu

Lagu: Edry Abd Halim (KRU Publishing)
Lirik: Edry Abd Halim (KRU Publishing)

open our eyes

2010-04-06T23:23:00.005+10:00

Open Your Eyes
by: Maher Zain

Look around yourselves
Can't you see this wonder
Spreaded infront of you
The clouds floating by
The skies are clear and blue
Planets in the orbits
The moon and the sun
Such perfect harmony

Let's start question in ourselves
Isn't this proof enough for us
Or are we so blind
To push it all aside..
No..

We just have to
Open our eyes, our hearts, and minds
If we just look bright to see the signs
We can't keep hiding from the truth
Let it take us by surprise
Take us in the best way
(Allah..)
Guide us every single day..
(Allah..)
Keep us close to You
Until the end of time..

Look inside yourselves
Such a perfect order
Hiding in yourselves
Running in your veins
What about anger love and pain
And all the things you're feeling
Can you touch them with your hand?
So are they really there?

Lets start question in ourselves
Isn't this proof enough for us?
Or are we so blind
To push it all aside..?
No..

We just have to
Open our eyes, our hearts, and minds
If we just look bright to see the signs
We can't keep hiding from the truth
Let it take us by surprise
Take us in the best way
(Allah..)
Guide us every single day..
(Allah..)
Keep us close to You
Until the end of time..

When a baby's born
So helpless and weak
And you're watching him growing..
So why deny
Whats in front of your eyes
The biggest miracle of life..

We just have to
Open our eyes, our hearts, and minds
If we just look quiet we'll see the signs
We can't keep hiding from the truth
Let it take us by surprise
Take us in the best way
(Allah..)
Guide us every single day..
(Allah..)
Keep us close to You
Until the end of time..

Open your eyes and hearts and minds
If you just look bright to see the signs
We can't keep hiding from the truth
Let it take us by surprise
Take us in the best way
(Allah..)
Guide us every single day..
(Allah..)
Keep us close to You
Until the end of time..

Allah..
You created everything
We belong to You
Ya Robb we raise our hands
Forever we thank You..
الحمد الله
Alhamdulillah..

cinta

2010-03-29T22:40:00.006+11:00

TAHAJJUD CINTA
lagu asal: Siti Nurhaliza

Kau datang ketika duka
dan bintang bercahya
tunjukku ke jalan syurga

Kau datang ketika duka
dan bintang bercahya
tunjukku ke jalan syurga

Ku haus di tengah laut
lemas mencari tempat berpaut
kirimkan aku kekuatan
serta pedoman di kesesatan

Ku sunyi dalam gembira
perih pedih tanggung derita
sungguh aku bukan wali
yang suci dari hina dan benci

Kau datang ketika duka
dan bintang bercahya
tunjukku ke jalan syurga

Terlalu lama aku mencuba
terlalu banyak
cinta yang ku damba
tiada yang sempurna
hanyalah fana
Tuhan, ampuni hamba-Mu

Kau datang ketika duka
dan bintang bercahya
tunjukku ke jalan syurga

Ku rebah di dada malam
memecah dendam yang lama diam
ku tanggalkan baju dunia
dakapku dengan selimut syurga
ya Tuhanku hanya padamu
tempat mengadu segala rindu
limpahi ku rahmat kasihmu
dalam tahajjud cinta bersujud

A confession

2010-03-22T00:11:00.009+11:00

I suppose I have published quite a lot of entries these days. Poems, songs, lyrics, stories, wordings etc. etc. But I have come to realize that I proudly written considerably 'nothing' on my own, I must say.

Don’t believe me?

Here is my supporting detail, if you happen to be bestowed with plenty of time, try browsing through my archive, you will notice that ~~majority~~ 3/4th of my blog entries were from someone else website/blog. Of course, with permission and acknowledgment though. Notice the end note: from/adapted/retrieved/by___.

How funny is that huh?

So, I guess I have no reasons to blame my busy life anymore. I just have to admit the fact that I love reading other people's words and easily get impressed and inspired by them, and simply want to share with others.

But when it comes to get my brain works and to put pen to paper I’m just being downright lazy, or perhaps unskillful and incompetent to do so. I love reading but not writing! Enough said. Grrrr…

Yeh, I'm never ever gonna be good in expressing or delivering my thought, feeling or whatsoever. Either in writing or talking. I’m no expert on that. At all!

That’s the truth! Absolute truth~!

So, I guess my desire to keep this blog survive a bit longer is gone, day by day. Not because I have nothing to write and share, but more to my inability to express and put everything into words.

Adios amigos,

numbers

2010-03-20T13:46:00.027+11:00

If these alphabets
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

are represented as
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26

Therefore:
H-A-R-D-W-O-R -K
8+1+18+4+23+ 15+18+11 = 98%

And:
K-N-O-W-L-E- D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+ 5 = 96%

But:
A-T-T-I-T-U- D-E
1+20+20+9+20+ 21+4+5 = 100%

Then, look how far the love of God will take you:
L-O-V-E-O-F- G-O-D
12+15+22+5+15+ 6+7+15+4 = 101%

Therefore, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that:
While HARD WORK and KNOWLEDGE WILL get you close, and ATTITUDE will get you there, it's the LOVE OF GOD that will put you over the top~!

Have a nice day & God bless!!

*copied from http://tintamusafir86.blogspot.com

p/s: I wonder how far my name can go (^_^) 200%?
Since I have a very long name (I mean my full name ok),
then it should simply bring me to the top right? ngeh3

Adam &

2010-03-20T00:22:00.017+11:00

Assalamu'alaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh. ..

Untuk renungan bersama kaum Adam & kaum Hawa.Terdapat EMPAT golongan kaum Adam yang pada hari akhirat kelak akan ditarik masuk menemani kaum Hawa di neraka jahanam.

Mereka ialah:

1. AYAHNYA

Apabila diwaktu hidupnya, seseorang ayah tidak mempedulikan anak-anak perempuannya. Dia tidak memberikan segala keperluan agama seperti mengajar solat, puasa, mengaji dan sebagainya. Dia membiarkan anak-anak perempuannya tidak menutup aurat. Memberi kemewahan duniawi sahaja tidak memadai. Maka dia akan ditarik ke neraka oleh anaknya.

p/s: Duhai lelaki yang bergelar ayah, bagaimanakah halnya keadaan anak-anak perempuanmu sekarang? Adakah kau mengajar mereka bersolat & berpuasa? menutup aurat? pengetahuan agama? Jika tidak cukup salah satunya, maka bersedialah untuk menjadi bahan bakar neraka jahanam.

2. SUAMINYA

Apabila sang suami tidak mempedulikan tindak tanduk isterinya. Bergaul bebas di pejabat, memperhiaskan diri bukan untuk suami tetapi utk tatapan kaum lelaki yang bukan mahram. Apabila suami hanya mendiamkan diri walaupun hakikatnya merupakan seorang yang alim dimana solatnya tidak pernah bertangguh, maka sesungguhnya dia juga akan turut ditarik oleh isterinya bersama-sama ke dalam neraka.

p/s: Duhai lelaki yang bergelar suami, bagaimanakah halnya keadaan isterimu tercinta sekarang? Dimanakah dia? Bagaimana akhlaknya? Jika kau tidak menjaganya mengikut ketetapan syari'at, maka terimalah hakikat yang kau akan sehidup semati bersamanya di 'taman' neraka sana.

3. ABANG-ABANGNYA

Apabila ayahnya sudah tiada, abang-abangnya dan saudara lelakinya akan mengalas tanggungjawab menjaga maruah saudara-saudara wanitanya. Jikalau mereka hanya mementingkan keluarganya sahaja dan adiknya dibiarkan melencong dari ajaran Islam, tunggulah tarikan adiknya di akhirat kelak.

p/s: Duhai lelaki yang mempunyai adik perempuan, jangan hanya menjaga amalmu, dan jangan ingat kau terlepas. Kau juga akan dipertanggungjawabkan diakhirat kelak. Adakah dibiarkan sahaja adik-adikmu bergelumang dengan maksiat, tidak menutup aurat? Awasi mereka.

4. ANAK-ANAK LELAKINYA

Apabila seorang anak tidak menasihati seorang ibu perihal kelakuan yang haram disisi Islam. Apabila ibu membuat kemungkaran, mengumpat, memfitnah, mengata dan sebagainya, maka anak itu akan disoal dan dipertanggungjawabkan di akhirat kelak dan nantikan tarikan ibunya ke neraka.

p/s: Duhai anak-anak lelaki, sayangilah ibumu, nasihatilah dia jika tersalah atau terlupa,kerana ibumu juga insan biasa, tak lepas dari melakukan dosa,s elamatkanlah dia dari menjadi 'kayu api' neraka. Jika tidak, kau juga akan ditarik menjadi penemannya.

Lihatlah, betapa hebatnya tarikan Hawa bukan sahaja di dunia malah di akhirat juga. Maka kepada kaum Adam yang bergelar ayah/suami/abang atau anak, sedarlah! Anda harus memainkan peranan anda. Sesungguhnya anda semua telah diberikan hak dan amanah untuk menjaga para wanita di dunia ini.

Dan kepada kaum Hawa, janganlah kita goyang kaki saja, sedarlah. Jangan kita terus menjadi bebanan kepada kaum Adam kerana sesungguhnya tanggungjawab mereka teramat besar. Sama-samalah kita saling bantu membantu agar aman dunia dan akhirat. InsyaALLAH~

Firman Allah S.W.T;

"Hai anak Adam, peliharalah diri kamu serta ahlimu dari api neraka dimana bahan bakarnya ialah manusia, jin dan batu-batu... ."

*diubahsuai dari coretan WANI TWIN

Hawa

2010-03-19T22:43:00.010+11:00

Wahai Hawa...

Kenapa engkau tak menghargai nikmat Iman dan Islam itu ?
Kenapa mesti engkau kaku dalam mentaati ajaran-Nya ?
kenapa masih segan mengamalkan isi kandungan-nya ?
dan kenapa masih was-was dalam mematuhi perintah-Nya ?

Wahai Hawa…

Sadarlah..
Tangan yang mengoncang buaian boleh mengoncang dunia,
kau boleh mengoncang dunia dengan melahirkan manusia yang hebat!!
yakni yang soleh dan solehah,
kau boleh menggegar dunia dengan menjadi isteri yang taat
serta memberi dorongan dan sokongan pada suami yang sejati
dalam menegakkan Islam di mata dunia.

Tapi hawa..
Jangan sesekali kau cuba menggoncang keimanan lelaki
dengan lembut tuturmu,
dengan ayu wajahmu,
dengan lengguk tubuhmu.
Jangan kau menghentak-hentak kakimu untuk menyatakan kehadiranmu.

Jangan Hawa …
Jangan sesekali cuba menarik perhatian kaum Adam yang bukan suamimu
kerana aku khuatir ia mengundang kemurkaan dan kebencian ALLAH.

BAHAYA! Ia bisa memberi kegembiraan pada syaitan..
kerana wanita ialah jala syaitan,
Alat yang dieksploitasikan oleh syaitan dalam menyesatkan kaum Adam.

Hawa,
Andai engkau masih remaja..
Jadilah anak yang soehah buat kedua ibu bapamu,
Andai engkau sudah bersuami..
Jadilah isteri yang meringankan beban suamimu,
Andai engkau seorang ibu..
Didiklah anakmu sehingga ia tak gentar memperjuangkan Ad-din ALLAH.

Hawa,
Andai engkau belum bernikah,
Jangan kau risau akan jodohmu,
ingatlah hawa akan janji Rabb kita,
wanita yang baik adalah untuk lelaki yang baik.

Jangan menggadaikan maruahmu..
hanya semata-mata kerana seorang lelaki,
jangan memakai pakaian yang menampakkan lekuk tubuhmu
hanya untuk menarik perhatian dan memikat kaum lelaki,
kerana kau bukan memancing hatinya..
tapi merangsang nafsunya.

Wahai Hawa…
Jangan sesekali dikau mulakan pertemuan dengan lelaki yang bukan muhrim
kerana aku khuatir dari mata turun ke hati,
dari senyuman membawa ke salam,
dari salam cenderung kepada pertemuan
dan dari pertemuaan takut lahirnya nafsu kejahatan yang menguasai diri.

Hawa …
Lelaki yang Baik tidak melihat paras rupa,
Lelaki yang soleh tidak memilih wanita melalui keseksiannya,
Lelaki yang wara’ tidak menilai wanita melalui keayuaannya,
kemanjaannya serta kemampuannya menggoncang iman mereka.

Tetapi hawa …
Lelaki yang baik akan menilai wanita melalui akhlaknya,
peribadinya dan ad-dinnya...
Lelaki yang soleh tidak menginginkan sebuah pertemuan
dengan wanita yang bukan muhrimnya
kerana dia takut menberi kesempatan pada syaitan untuk mengodanya.

Lelaki yang wara’ juga tak mahu bermain cinta s
ebabnya dia tahu apa matlamat dalam sebuah hubungan antara lelaki dan wanita
yakni perkahwinan.

Oleh itu Hawa …
Jagalah pandanganmu,
Jagalah pakaianmu,
Jagalah akhlakmu,
Kuatkan pendirianmu...

Andai kata ditakdirkan tiada cinta dari Adam untukmu,
Cukuplah hanya cinta ALLAH menyinari dan memenuhi jiwamu,
biarlah hanya cinta kedua ibu bapamu
yang memberi hangatan kebahagiaan buat dirimu,
cukuplah sekadar cinta adik beradik serta keluarga yang akan membahagiakan dirimu.

Hawa …
Cintailah ALLAH..
Dikala susah dan senang kerana kau akan memperolehi cinta
dari insan yang juga menyintai ALLAH.
Cintailah kedua ibu bapamu,
kerana kau akan perolehi keridhaan ALLAH TA'ALAA
Cintailah keluargamu,
kerana tiada cinta selain cinta keluarga.

Hawa …
Ingatanku yang terakhir, biarlah tangan yang menggoncang buaian ini
dapat menggoncang dunia dalam menggapai keridhaan ILAHI.
Jangan sesekali..
tangan ini juga yang menggoncang keimanan kaum Adam,
kerana aku sukar menerimanya dan aku benci mendengarnya.

Pesanan Cinta dari Ukhti Aisyatulhumaira "Jilbaber"

From http://to-netty.blogspot.com

Hanya sekadar berkongsi untuk peringatan diri sendiri
Personally, bila melihat nukilan ini
senang untuk mataku melihatnya
lalu senang juga untuk otakku memprosesnya dan cuba menafsirkannya,
tapi senangkah hati aku untuk benar-benar merenungi dan memahaminya?
senangkah anggota badanku untuk melakukannya?
tepukku pada dada bertanyakan diri

menyedari yang diriku ini tersngt sangat jauh sejauh-jauhnya
dari yang sepatutnya ada pada muslimah sejati
mmg macam langit dan bumi la,
tapi jujur
dari sudut hati yang paling dalam sedalam-dalamnya
alangkah inginnya aku menjadi wanita seumpama itu

insyaAllah

Life is too short

2010-03-18T18:41:00.004+11:00

life is too short
grudges are a waste of perfect happiness

laugh when you can
apologize when you should
& let go of what you can't change

love deeply
& forgive quickly
take chances
give everything
& have no regrets

life is too short to be unhappy
you have to take the good with the bad

smile when you are sad
love what you've got
& always remember what you had

always forgive but never forget
learn from your mistakes
but never regret

people change
and things go wrong
but always remember
life goes on

by: Christina K.

“As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn’t supposed to let you down probably will. You will have your heart broken more than once, and it’s a little harder every time. You will fight with your best friend. You will blame a new love for things an old one did. You’ll cry because time is passing too fast, and you will eventually lose someone you love. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, and love like you’ve never been hurt; because every minute you spend upset is a minute of happiness you’ll never get back.”
-unknown-

FRIEND

2010-03-18T00:09:00.005+11:00

HARAMKAH?

2010-03-16T02:14:00.005+11:00

HARAMKAH
By Melly Goeslow

Haram-haramkah aku
Bila hatiku jatuh cinta
Tuhan pegangi hatiku
Biar aku tak jadi melanggar

Aku cinta pada dirinya
Cinta pada pandang pertama
Sifat manusia ada padaku
Aku bukan Tuhan

Haram-haramkah aku
Bila aku terus menantinya
Biar waktu berakhir
Bumi dan langit berantakan

Aku tetap ingin dirinya
Tak mungkin aku berdusta
Hanya Tuhan yang bisa jadikan
Yang tak mungkin menjadi mungkin

Aku hanya ingin cinta yang halal
Di mata dunia juga akhirat
Biar aku sepi aku hampa aku basi
Tuhan sayang aku

Aku hanya ingin cinta yang halal
Dengan dia tentu atas ijinNya
Ketika cinta bertasbih
Tuhan beri aku cinta

Ku menanti cinta

p/s: dedicated to AZZAM dan ANNA (watak KCB)

COME & GO

2010-03-15T19:33:00.013+11:00

Another 3 weeks have gone past since I last posted my entry. Sadly to say, I’ve almost forgotten about the existence of this blog. But I really want to keep this blog going purposely for my writing pleasure.

To date, I’ve been living in this planet for nearly ~~half a century~~ ¼ th of a century or to be exact; 24 years, 2 months and 21 days.

And I started to agree with these statements.

"Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for a while and they leave footprints on our hearts. And we are never, ever the same."

Yes, very true indeed~! I realized that so many people fly in and fly out of my life. Some stay for a year, some a week, and some sufficient enough for me to remember. Then, there are the ones who I don’t even realize they're there until they disappeared, never been seen again.

No matter how long they stay with me, I have to admit that these people have affected my life in some profound ways. Some of them might have taught me new knowledge, opened up my mind or showed me good examples whereas others might have cheated me, broken my trust and shattered my heart.

But each and every one of them have left a mark on me, that's for sure. I will never ever be the same person again. In a positive way or negative way? Only me know.

unknown

2010-02-26T15:34:00.009+11:00

"It's better to cry than to be angry. Anger hurts others, while tears flow silently through the soul and cleanse the heart."

sms

2010-02-25T15:56:00.013+11:00

18:38 Wednesday 24-02-2010
Kak Lah, hari ni hari gapo? Male ni buko skype ma nok kecek

Aku tergaru-garu kepala. "Kenapa dengan adik aku ni? Salah taip la tu kot" aku bermonolog sendirian.

Tanpa berfikir panjang jari-jemariku mula menekan-nekan touchpad handphoneku, "Arini ari Rabu laaa dik. Bakpo tanyo? ..."

Sebelum sempat jari-jemariku meyudahkan tarian di atas lantainya, aku memandang semula sms adik untuk melihat apa soalan kedua yang telah diajukan.

Aku mengecilkan mataku sambil mengerutkan dahi. "Aik, macam ada yang pelik di situ", getus hati kecilku. Kebiasaannya, nama ayah yang akan digunakan bila tiba bab-bab Skype, kenapa kali ni nama mak? Tertanya-tanya diriku sendirian.

Tiba-tiba mataku terpaku pada angka 24-02-2010 18:38 yang terpapar di kaki sms. Aneh, bagaikan ia ingin memberitahuku sesuatu.

"waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!" sepintas kilat impulse dalam otakku sabung-menyabung melengkapkan electrical circuit dari satu dendrite ke satu dendrite yang lain.

Secara refleks, tangan kiriku terus mencapai mobile Optus dan mendail nombor yang dah tersimpan dalam long term memory ku.

"Selamat hari lahir mak~! Sorry, Lah ter......lupa..huhuhu" jeritku penuh kekesalan. Perbualan berlarutan sehingga berapa ketika. Banyak juga yang dibualkan.

Tapi antara yang mengejutkan aku ialah bila mak seraya berkata "Long mesej mak pagi-pagi lagi. Dia siap tanya Lah dah wish ke". Bagaikan tidak percaya, abangku ingat birthday orang?? Wahahooo satu improvement tu Long! hehehe... keep it up~!

Apa-apa pun nasib baikla aku tak sempat send mesej tu lagi, kalau tak adehhh, malu. Patutla bila aku tengok status Diha, wish adik dia birthday, aku rasa macam ada sesuatu tapi tak tau apa. Rupa-rupanya birthday ibu sendiri. Apa nak jadi ngan kau ni Fadh..haih..

Pengajaran:
Walau sesibuk mana pun kita, sentiasa ingatlah hari-hari istimewa dalam hidup orang yang disayangi. Kalau dah tau diri tu pelupa, buat reminder~! pertama kali dalam hidup aku lupa =_=`

Selamat Hari Lahir untuk ibuku yang tersayang~
yang ke ehem ehem...51, dah lebih separuh abad dah..
24 tahun yang lalu, orang ini lah yang bersusah payah melahirkanku di subuh-subuh hari.
Terima kasih yang tak terhingga Lah ucapkan.
Moga Mak sentiasa berada di bawah payung rahmat dan perlindunganNya
Amin..

Kepada si budak kecik tu pula, terima kasih atas sms adik.
Kalau la adik tak sms, memang Kak Lah tak ingat dah.
Huhu..
Thanks dik~

sejenak termenung

2010-02-25T13:42:00.009+11:00

"Kita boleh menghitung usia kita yang telah kita gunakan, tetapi kita tidak boleh menghitung berapa lagi usia kita yang masih tinggal. Persoalannya, bagaimana persediaan kita apabila usia yang terkandung di dalam jasad kita sudah habis digunakan..." -- Prof Dr Hamka

Aku sesuai dengan dugaan hamba Ku kepada Ku;
Dan Aku bersama dengannya ketika dia ingat kepada Ku;
Jika dia ingat kepada Ku di dalam hatinya;
Aku akan mengingatinya di dalam hati Ku;
Dan jika dia ingat kepada Ku dalam khalayak ramai;
Nescaya Aku juga akan mengingatinya
dalam lingkungan khalayak ramai yang lebih baik;
Dan jika dia mendekati aku sejengkal;
Aku pun akan mendekatinya sehasta;
Dan jika dia mendekati Ku sehasta;
Nescaya Aku mendekatinya sedepa;
Dan jika dia datang kepada Ku berjalan;
Maka aku mendatanginya dengan berlari;

Hadith Riwayat Syaikhani dan Tarmizi

Aku terfikir, adakah Allah akan tetap mengampunkan dosa HambaNya jika dosa yang dilakukan itu terlalu besar?

p/s: Jutaan maaf andaikata mengguris hati sesiapa. Tetapi seikhlasnya dan sejujurnya tidak sekali-kali terlintas apatah lagi berniat untuk melukai. Sesungguhnya kasih sayang Allah itu membatasi kasih sayang seluruh makhlukNya.

the veil

2010-02-02T23:29:00.017+11:00

I just would like to share this article (from The Brunei Times) with women out there.

There are a number of health benefits that wearing the veil can provide, as well as many behavioral science studies that suggest that the veil is the best attire for women. Protecting the head is very important from a health perspective.

Results of medical tests show that 40-60% of body heat is lost through the head, so persons wearing head coverings during cold months are protected about fifty-percent more than those who do not.

Chinese and Muslim medical texts take this concept even further. In theHua Di Nei Jing (The Yellow Emperor’s Classic on Internal Medicine), wind is said to cause sudden changes within the body, and shaking, swaying, and other movements that potentially upset the body’s equilibrium; thus, creating bad health.

These texts attribute the common cold to wind elements entering the body and causing the typical symptoms of sneezing and a runny nose.

In the traditional Islamic medical texts of Al-Jawziyya, we can find numerous references to the “four elements”of fire, water, air, and earth, and how these affect the body in
adverse ways.

In particular, we are advised to stay away from drafts and to protect our heads in wind, breezes, drafts, and cold weather. All outdoor workers should wear some sort of head covering for this reason.

Protecting the head is even more important in warm weather. VG Rocine, a prominent brain research specialist, has found that brain phosphorus melts at 108 degrees Fahrenheit; a temperature that can be easily reached if one stays under the hot sun for any length of time without a head covering.

When this happens, irreversible brain damage, memory loss and loss of some brain functions can result. Although this example is extreme, brain damage can still be measured in small degrees from frequent exposure to and overheating of the head.

Butterfly

2010-01-26T23:29:00.025+11:00

A man found a cocoon of a butterfly. One day a small opening appeared. He sat and watched the butterfly for several hours as it struggled to force its body through that little hole. Then it seemed to stop making any progress. It appeared as if it had gotten as far as it could, and it could go no further.

So the man decided to help the butterfly. He took a pair of scissors and snipped off the remaining bit of the cocoon.The butterfly then emerged easily. But it had a swollen body and small, shriveled wings.

The man continued to watch the butterfly because he expected that, at any moment, the wings would enlarge and expand to be able to support the body, which would contract in time. Neither happened! In fact, the butterfly spent the rest of its life crawling around with a swollen body and shriveled wings. It never was able to fly.

What the man, in his kindness and haste, did not understand was that the restricting cocoon and the struggle required for the butterfly to get through the tiny opening were God's way of forcing fluid from the body of the butterfly into its wings so that it would be ready for flight once it achieved its freedom from the cocoon.

Sometimes struggles are exactly what we need in our lives. If God allowed us to go through our lives without any obstacles, it would cripple us. We would not be as strong as what we could have been. We could never fly!

we asked for strength but HE gave us difficulties to make us strong~!
we asked for wisdom but HE gave us problems to solve~!

we asked for courage but HE gave us danger to overcome~!

we asked for prosperity but HE gave us brain & brawn to do the work~!
we asked for love but HE gave us troubled people to help~!
we asked for favours but HE gave us opportunities to grab~!
we received nothing we wanted but HE gave us everything we needed~!

وَمَا تَنقِمُ مِنَّآ إِلَّآ أَنۡ ءَامَنَّا بِـَٔايَـٰتِ رَبِّنَا لَمَّا جَآءَتۡنَا‌ۚ رَبَّنَآ أَفۡرِغۡ عَلَيۡنَا صَبۡرً۬ا وَتَوَفَّنَا مُسۡلِمِينَ

Our Lord! Pour out on us patience and constancy, and make us die as those who have surrendered themselves unto You (7:126)

*Adapted from wulfrunasufi.wordpress.com

numb3rs

2010-01-23T11:56:00.006+11:00

I found this 'thing' very fascinating & I still can't figure out the formula behind its creation. Grab a calculator and give it a go!!

1. Key in the first three digits of your (MALAYSIA) handphone number [not the carrier no. 01x]
2. Multiply by 80 (x80)
3. Then, add 1 (+1)
4. Multiply by 250 (x250)
5. Add the last four digits of your handphone number
6. Add the last 4 digits of your handphone number again
7. Then, minus 250 (-250)
7. Lastly, divide by 2 (÷2)

Is it your handphone number?

awesome right!!!

e.g: 0 1 2 - 3 4 5 6 7 8 9
345 x 80 + 1 x 250 + 6789 + 6789 - 250 ÷ 2 = 3456789

p/s: Do one operation at a time accordingly.
Do not key-in all the operations at once coz it will give you different answers

السلام عليكم

2010-01-20T17:29:00.008+11:00

هاري ني تيبا-تيبا جا راسا نق توليس دالم توليسن جاوي. كونونڽ تق نق باڬي اورڠ فهم لا. هو هو. سجق دوا منجق ني، راسا ماچم سديه جا. بايڠكن كرجا يڠ كيت لاكوكن هاري-هاري اشيق تق منجادي ساج. دالم ارتي كات لاين سيا-سيا. راسا چم لمه سماڠت. كادڠ-كادڠ بيلا كيت سديه، كيت راسا نق لواهكن ڤد سساورڠ، تاڤي انتهلا..ماچم-ماچم رياكسي مأنسي بيلا مندڠر مسئله اورڠ لاين ني:

ڬولوڠن 1: ترلالو ڤوسيتيف. بيلا كيت منچريتاكن مسئله كيت، مريك اين ترلالو ڤوسيتيف. سمواڽ نق دڤوسيتيفكن. ميمڠلا باڬوس تاڤي سمڤأي ساتو تاهڤ چم ادوس. ماچم راسا تق دفهمي ساج. تاڤي اكو تاهو نية مريك باءيق ايايت چوبا اونتوق مننڠكن هاتي يڠ ڬونده ڬولانا دڠن كات-كات يڠ باءيق.

ڬولوڠن 2: ترلالو نيڬاتيف. بيلا كيت چريتا مسئله كيت، مريك اين ماكين مڠاڤي-اڤيكن كادأن. ماكين مناءيقكن كسديهن اتاو كمارهن كيت ڤولا. موڠكين نية مريك نق تونجوق يڠ مريك ممهمي اڤ اكو راس، نق اكو راس اكو دفهمي تاڤي ادوس جوڬ...ماكين تروق لا جاديڽ ننتي.

ڬولوڠن 3: بوكن ڤندڠر. مريك ني، بيلا كيت چريتا مسئله كيت، بوكن مندڠر تاڤي اكن مريك اكن مموتوڠ كات-كات كيت دڠن ايات-ايات بڬيني." ايتلا اكو دولو".. "كاو تق تاو اكو ني لاڬي لا". سأكن-اكن مسئله كيت ني ريميه-تيميه ساڠت دان مسئله مريك لبيه هيبت. مريك ني ڤرنه تمڤوه بندا لاڬي هيبت دري اكو لا.

ڬولوڠن 4: كونون كول. بيلا كيت چريتا مسئله، ماچم بوات تق تاو. اڠڬوق-اڠڬوق جا. ميمڠ ڤندڠر بتول، تق برسوارا سديكيت ڤون تو. ادوس. نق چريتا ڤون تق اد مود ده، ماچم چاكڤ دڠن توڠڬول.

كسيمڤولنڽ، اكو راس بيارله اكو دڠن مسئله اكو. باءيق سيمڤن ساجا..ايت لبيه باءيق.اكو تق برنية نق كريتيك اورڠ لاين سبب اكو ڤون تق تاو اكو دالم ڬولوڠن مان بيلا مندڠر مسئله اورڠ. هو هو.. يڠ اكو تاو نية مريك سموا ميمڠ باءيق تاڤي دتونجوقكن دڠن چارا بربيذا-بيذا.موڠكين تق كنا دڠن چارا كيت.بوكن ساله مريك لا..

جادي، يڠ ترممڤو اكو لاكوكن اياله برچريتا ڤدڽ، موڬ دڤرمودهكن سڬالاڽ دان دبريكن جالن ڤڽلساين.

a life

2010-01-09T23:49:00.006+11:00

If someone loves you, give love back to them in
whatever way you can, not only because they love you,
but because in a way, they are teaching you to love
and how to open your heart and eyes to things.

If someone hurts you, betrays you, or breaks your
heart, forgive them, for they have helped you learn
about trust and the importance of being cautious to
whom you open your heart.

Make every day count. Appreciate every moment and take
from those moments everything that you possibly can
for you may never be able to experience it again. Talk
to people that you have never talked to before, and
listen to what they have to say.

Let yourself fall in love, break free, and set your
sights high. Hold your head up because you have every
right to. Tell yourself you are a great individual and
believe in yourself, for if you don't believe in
yourself, it will be hard for others to believe in
you.

You can make anything you wish of your life. Create
your own life and then go out and live it with
absolutely no regrets.

And if you love someone tell them, for you never know
what tomorrow may have in store.

Learn a lesson in life each day that you live! Today
is the tomorrow you were worried about yesterday. Was
it worth it?

author unknown

new year

2010-01-06T14:00:00.021+11:00

Sometimes people come into your life and you know
right away that they were meant to be there, to serve
some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson, or to help
you figure out who you are or who you want to become.

You never know who these people may be - a roommate, a
neighbor, a professor, a friend, a lover, or even a
complete stranger - but when you lock eyes with them,
you know at that very moment they will affect your
life in some profound way.

Sometimes things happen to you that may seem horrible,
painful, and unfair at first, but in reflection you
find that without overcoming those obstacles you would
have never realized your potential, strength,
willpower, or heart.

Illness, injury, love, lost moments of true greatness,
and sheer stupidity all occur to test the limits of
your soul. Without these small tests, whatever they
may be, life would be like a smoothly paved straight
flat road to nowhere. It would be safe and
comfortable, but dull and utterly pointless.

The people you meet who affect your life, and the
success and downfalls you experience, help to create
who you are and who you become. Even the bad
experiences can be learned from. In fact, they are
sometimes the most important ones.

unknown author

The old year has gone as the new year dawns. Hopes high, dreams big, promises new and joys afresh. May 2010 brings us the beginning of brighter tomorrows!

HAPPY NEW YEAR~!

This is who i am

2009-11-13T01:12:00.009+11:00

I spend my life,
trying to do things right
but all I do is fall to my face
with my hands on my head so many times
but then I learnt, after being burnt
to get back up and push straight on
stop the tears people move on, on

Well it's alright to be myself
now I've learnt to stand
well it's ok to be just who I am
I spent years really hating me
longing to be friends,
now I hope that you can understand
This is who I am

Now when life gets tough
I'm quick to hurry up
I run all day, I run through the night
I break down walls, I hit up high
I don't care if I'm fat,
or if you think my clothes are bad
'cos I can go to sleep at night,
I'm a good person and I'll get by

Well It's alright to be myself
now I've learnt to stand
well it's ok to be just who I am
I spent years really hating me
longing to be friends,
now I hope that you can understand
This is who I am

Are you someone,
are you someone,
are you someone,
someone like me
you deserve,
you deserve,
you deserve to be free
'cos the world will keep spinning,
and you'll be trapped in it

Well it's alright to be myself
now I've learnt to stand
well it's ok to be just who I am
I've spent years really hating me
longing to be friends, now I hope that you can understand
This is who I am

p/s: be who you want to be! not what others wanna see...

LOVE

2009-11-05T17:13:00.002+11:00

things to do

2009-11-04T12:54:00.017+11:00

THINGS TO DO BEFORE 20/11/09

1. Submit Literature Review ~3000 words
2. Submit Method Section
3. Get images - immunofluorescence microscopy
4. Get images - deconvolution misroscopy
5. Get images - confocal microscopy
6. Renew contract of the house
7. Oral presentation?
8. Souvenir shopping
9. Make a proper planning for my 1 month summer holiday
10. More to come?

Now all I need to do is

Take a real deep breath,
haaaaaaa...
huuuuuuuu...

Count to ten
1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10!

Then try to tackle each task
one step at a time!

tp
sempat ke??
huhuhuhuh

By hook
or by crook
All tasks need to be completed
or else
I will ruin my holiday >.<

.....................................................................................

I wish I can have a very good holiday this year,
away from my books,
away from lab stuffs,
- from mice,
slides,
microtome,
cryostat,
microscopes,
all in all,
away from Melbourne!

juz wanna spend my valuable time
with my loved ones,
happily and
cheerfully

not to forget
wanna sumbat my perut
with Malaysian food
keropok lekor
budu
fruits
vege
junk food
KFC
PIZZA HUT
and byk lg~
as much as I can :P

InsyaALLAH
yeay!!

p/s: so tunggu apa lagi??
get to work now!!
(=_=) zZZ

for you...

2009-11-02T00:09:00.012+11:00

by: Sami Yusuf

Without your warmth, without your smile
Without you, by my side
The world was so cold, I felt so lost
Without your light, I felt so blind

A thousand miles I'd run and walk
A thousand times I'd slip and fall
But for you I'd do it again
A thousand times

You gave me hope, you let me dream
Made me believe I can still trust
You raised me up, you gave me wings
Just like a kite in the sky

No words are enough to convey
All the things I want to say
I won't even try 'cos I know
Deep down you feel how much I care

Now I hold my head up high
I see my dreams coming true
Peace be with you my dearest friend
In my heart you will remain

A thousand miles I'd run and walk
A thousand times I'd slip and fall
But for you I'd do it again

A thousand times

p/s: to all my friends who will be leaving for good this year.

One word:
THANKS!

Thank you so much for being my friend ~
Thanks 'cos always willing to give a helping hand whenever I need it.
Each one of you have taught me a lot, really!

May your life be filled with dazzling blessings just as I am blessed by being your friend.

Love you all a thousand times~!

hurting

2009-11-01T19:07:00.006+11:00

He knows

2009-10-29T11:04:00.022+11:00

When you feel all alone in this world
And there's nobody to count your tears
Just remember, no matter where you are
Allah knows
Allah knows

When you carrying a monster load
And you wonder how far you can go
With every step on that road that you take
Allah knows
Allah knows

No matter what, inside or out
There's one thing of which there's no doubt
Allah knows
Allah knows
And whatever lies in the heavens and the earth
Every star in this whole universe
Allah knows
Allah knows

When you find that special someone
Feel your whole life has barely begun
You can walk on the moon, shout it to everyone
Allah knows
Allah knows

When you gaze with love in your eyes
Catch a glimpse of paradise
And you see your child take the first breath of life
Allah knows
Allah knows

When you lose someone close to your heart
See your whole world fall apart
And you try to go on but it seems so hard
Allah knows
Allah knows

You see we all have a path to choose
Through the valleys and hills we go
With the ups and the downs, never fret never frown
Allah knows
Allah knows

Every grain of sand,
In every desert land, He knows.
Every shade of palm,
Every closed hand, He knows.
Every sparkling tear,
On every eyelash, He knows.
Every thought I have,
And every word I share, He knows.

Allah knows

Allah knows what's best for us
So why should we complain?
We always want the sunshine
But He knows there must be rain

We always want the laughter
And the merriment of cheer
But our hearts lose their tenderness
If we never shed a tear

Allah tests us often
With suffering and with sorrow
He tests us not to punish us
But to help us meet tomorrow

For growing trees are strengthened
If they withstand the storm
And the sharp cut of the chisel
Gave the marble grace and form

Allah tests us often
And for every bit of pain
Provided we are patient
Is followed by rich gain

So whenever we are down
And everything is going wrong
It is just Allah's way
To make our spirit strong

http://www.islamawareness.net/Poems/poem0008.html

p/s: Am such a bad 'manusia'
in time of joy, I rarely appreciate you
but in time of sorrow, I will always turn to you

ada empat isteri ke? fuyyyoo!!

2009-10-27T15:38:00.020+11:00

Are you against polygamy?
Not keen to read a lengthy post?

Just spend 2minutes
read this story till the end of the page.

On your first glance you might think that this story is absolutely rubbish and definitely irrelevant to your life.

But you might get something out of this~

---------------------------------------------------------

Once upon a time. There was a rich merchant who had four wives.

He loved the fourth wife the most and adorned her with rich robes and treated her to delicacies. He took great care of her and gave her nothing but the best.

He also loved the third wife very much. He's very proud of her and always wanted to show off her to his friends. However, the merchant is always in great fear that she might run away with some other men.

He too, loved his second wife. She is a very considerate person, always patient and in fact is the merchant's confidante. Whenever the merchant faced some problems, he always turned to his 2nd wife and she would always help him out and tide him through difficult times.

Now, the merchant's first wife is a very loyal partner and has made great contributions in maintaining his wealth and business as well as taking care of the household. However, the merchant did not love the first wife and although she loved him deeply, he hardly took notice of her.

One day, the merchant fell ill.

Before long, he knew that he was going to die soon. He thought of his luxurious life and told himself,

"Now I have 4 wives with me. But when I die, I'll be alone. How lonely I'll be!"

Thus, he asked the fourth wife,

"I loved you most, endowed you with the finest clothing and showered great care over you. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?"

"No way!" replied the fourth wife and she walked away without another word.

The answer cut like a sharp knife right into the merchant's heart.

The sad merchant then asked the third wife,

"I have loved you so much for all my life. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?"

"No!" replied the third wife. "Life is so good over here! I'm going to remarry when you die!"

The merchant's heart sank and turned cold.

He then asked the second wife,

"I always turned to you for help and you've always helped me out. Now I need your help again. When I die, will you follow me and keep me company?"

"I'm sorry, I can't help you out this time!" replied the second wife. "At the very most, I can only send you to your grave."

The answer came like a bolt of thunder and the merchant was devastated.

Then a voice called out:

"I'll leave with you. I'll follow you no matter where you go."The merchant looked up and there was his first wife.

She was so skinny, almost like she suffered from malnutrition.

Greatly grieved, the merchant said,

"I should have taken much better care of you while I could have!"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Actually, we all have 4 wives in our lives!!!

The fourth wife is our body. No matter how much time and effort we lavish in making it look good, it'll leave us when we die.

Our third wife is our possessions, status and wealth. When we die, they all go to others.

The second wife is our family and friends. No matter how close they had been there for us when we're alive, the furthest they can stay by us is up to the grave.

The first wife is in fact our soul, often neglected in our pursuit of material wealth and sensual pleasure.

Guess what? It is actually the only thing that follows us wherever we go. Perhaps it's a good idea to cultivate and strengthen it now rather than to wait until we're on our deathbed to lament.

*retrieved from http://www.ezsoftech.com/stories/mis25.asp

a picture of swEEtNeSS!

2009-10-27T00:05:00.017+11:00

Kingdom: Animalia

Phylum: Chordata

Class: Aves

Order: Passeriformes

Suborder: Passeri

Family: Cardinalidae

Have you ever seen this bird before?
Yes?
No?

So, what have you heard about it?

People call it cardinal bird as the bright red color of the male species is very similar to the vestments used by Catholic cardinals.

However, the female is usually brown with a little red on the wings, crest and bill.
(some colour variation may exist)

What's so special about these birds?

They are well-known as songbirds!!!

Both male and female cardinals can sing, better than us ^_^, but the female normally sings longer and in a more beautiful complex melody.

When the female cardinal sings from the nest, it may be a sign to the male that she is in need of food.

Female cardinals sings usually after male establishes territory & before nestling starts as well.

The male cardinal is very territorial and protects his breeding space from any male that comes his way.

In fact, if we put male cardinals in front of a mirror, the male cardinal will spend hours trying to expel his reflected image that he perceives as an intruder.

Cardinals are a picture of sweetness~!

During mating, the male looks for food and involves the female in a ritual called “mate feeding”

The male will feed his lover by putting the food into its mate’s bill as if they were passionately kissing each other to symbolizes their love =)

Once they mate, they spend the rest of their days singing beautiful songs with each other and living happily ever after~

How sweeeeet they are...

Below is my paper-cardinal bird =)

did not resemble any cardinal features & characteristics at all
Failed successfully!
haha

tulang-belulang

2009-10-26T10:43:00.023+11:00

INTERESTING FACTS ABOUT BONES

1. Newborn babies have 270 bones in their body but by the time they become an adult, the number shrink to 206

:S why?
because many bones making up the skull and the spine fuse together as the body grows and becomes older

2. A quarter of our bones (=52 bones) are located in our feet (including toes and ankle)

3. There are 54 bones in our hands including the wrists

4. Femur (thigh bone) is the longest bone in the body and it comprises roughly 1/4 of the persons overall height

5. The smallest bone?? the stapes (stirrup) bone which is located in the middle ear

6. If an identical twin grows up without having a certain tooth, the other twin will most likely also grow up with that tooth missing

sujud

2009-10-21T11:17:00.001+11:00

Ayat-Ayat Cinta
by: ROSSA

Desir pasir di padang tandus
Segersang pemikiran hati
Terkisah ku di antara
Cinta yang rumit

Bila keyakinanku datang
Kasih bukan sekadar cinta
Pengorbanan cinta yang agung
Ku pertaruhkan

Maafkan bila ku tak sempurna
Cinta ini tak mungkin ku cegah
Ayat-ayat cinta bercerita
Cintaku padamu

Bila bahagia mulai menyentuh
Seakan ku bisa hidup lebih lama
Namun harus ku tinggalkan cinta
Ketika ku bersujud

Ketika ku bersujud

..............................................................................................

bila terlalu cinta pada seseorg,
atau pada kerja,
atau pada minat yang mendalam,
atau pada sesuatu benda,
atau pada apa sahaja;

akan tidak kita abaikan mereka,
walau sesesak mane masa yang ada;
akan tidak kita tinggalkan mereka,
walau seringkali terjauh;
akan tidak kita lupakan mereka,
walau dalam lena;

cuma di keajaiban sujud,
akhirnya ia terkecuali;
hanya ketika itulah,
kita redha dan pasrah,
melepaskan mereka pergi.

p/s: usah tangisi akan perpisahan sebaliknya tangisi akan pertemuan. Tanpa pertemuan, maka tiadalah perpisahan

HOLES

2009-10-20T19:20:00.001+11:00

There once was a little boy who had a bad temper. His Father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper and get angry, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence.

The first day the little boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. Little boy discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.

Finally the day came when the little boy did not lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the little boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The day passed and the little boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone. The father took his little boy by the hand and led him to the fence. He said, "You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence.

The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. ” A verbal wound is as bad as a physical one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out. It won't matter how many times you say I'm sorry, the wound is still there."

*copy from http://www.ezsoftech.com

...........................................................................................

Everyone has feelings. Everyone has emotions. One thing I could remember from my previous Health Practice Lecture back in 2007 is, there are 5 core emotions (some people might include surprise as a core emotion as well). Happiness, Sadness, Anger, Disgust, Fear, Surprise. We need all of them! They make us human...

However, don't ever let our emotion run our life! Control them wisely. Easier said than done I guess... huhu =(

p/s: Please forgive me if I have ever left a hole in any of you

U.N.I.Q.U.E

2009-10-19T23:27:00.001+11:00

Once upon a time there was a water-bearer in India who had two large pots, each hung on each end of a pole which he carried across his neck. One of the pots had a crack in it, and while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water at the end of the long walk from the stream to the master's house, the cracked pot arrived only half full. For a full two years this went on daily, with the bearer delivering only one and a half pot full of water in his master's house.

Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments, perfect to the end for which it was made. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserable that it was able to accomplish only half of what it had been made to do. After two years of what it perceived to be a bitter failure, it spoke to the water-bearer one day by the stream."

I am ashamed of myself, and I want to apologize to you." "Why?" asked the bearer. "What are you ashamed of ?" "I have been able, for these past two years, to deliver only half my load because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your master's house. Because of my flaws, you have to do all of this work and you don't get full value from your efforts, " the pot said. The water-bearer felt sorry for the old cracked pot, and in his compassion he said, "As we return to the master's house, I want you to notice the beautiful flowers along the path."

Indeed, as they went up the hill, the old cracked pot took notice of the sun warming the beautiful wild flowers on the side of the path, and this cheered it some. But at the end of the trail, it still felt bad because it had leaked out half its load, and so again it apologized to the bearer for its failure. The bearer said to the pot, "Did you notice that there were flowers only on your side of your path, but not on the other pot's side?

That's because have always known about your flaw, and I took advantage of it. I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back from the stream, you've watered them. For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate my master's table. Without you being just the way you are, he would not have this beauty to grace his house."

*copy from http://www.ezsoftech.com/stories

................................................................................................

I love this story ^_^, so very much! It makes me ponder how brilliant our Creator is! He created us different from each other. Not just unalike physically but also mentally, psychologically or even spiritually. To our eyes, we always noticed that some people are naturally bestowed with wealth, beauty, fame and some are just not that lucky, have life continually surrounded with misery. Meanwhile, some may have special talents such as drawing, singing or supernatural abilities etc while others are just ordinary human-beings. After all, everybody is different and unique! Each of us has our own special qualities and each of our life has its own added value to the world. Therefore, we have just got to take each person for what they are. Don't just be ashamed of ourselves but try bring something good out of us instead. Let's turn the flaws into strengh! The water-bearer in the story just did that, so can we! We should use everything we got to the best of our ability to become a better person ^_^

InsyaAllah~

.winter.spring.summer.autumn.

2009-10-19T21:03:00.001+11:00

There was a man who had four sons. He wanted his sons to learn not to judge things too quickly. So he sent them each on a quest, in turn, to go and look at a pear tree that was a great distance away.

The first son went in the winter, the second in the spring, the third in summer, and the youngest son in the fall.

When they had all gone and come back, he called them together to describe what they had seen.

The first son said that the tree was ugly, bent, and twisted.

The second son said no it was covered with green buds and full of promise.

The third son disagreed; he said it was laden with blossoms that smelled so sweet and looked so beautiful, it was the most graceful thing he had ever seen.

The last son disagreed with all of them; he said it was ripe and drooping with fruit, full of life and fulfillment.

The man then explained to his sons that they were all right, because they had each seen but only one season in the tree's life.

He told them that you cannot judge a tree, or a person, by only one season, and that the essence of who they are and the pleasure, joy, and love that come from that life can only be measured at the end, when all the seasons are up.

If you give up when it's winter, you will miss the promise of your spring, the beauty of your summer, fulfillment of your fall. Don't let the pain of one season destroy the joy of all the rest. Don't judge life by one difficult season. Persevere through the difficult patches and better times are sure to come some time or later.

*copy from http://www.ezsoftech.com/stories

................................................................................................................................................................................

This story is specially dedicated to all my friends who will be sitting for exams ^_^ in few weeks' time. Ade kaitan ke? haha...Yup, not directly relevant to the story but I can't help putting this up. Luv the story damn much! (But, I will make it sounds at least related to the it ;P ) Since your not-so-favorite season is coming up really soon, stop stressing out, let's go through this!! Moral of the story: always bear in your mind, other beautiful seasons are waiting ahead! Smiling at you... Hehe...If you just simply raise your hands and surrender, you will surely miss the satisfaction of 50 weeks hard-works, the enjoyment of after-exam party and the wonderful experience as a 'mahasiswa/mahasiswi'. So, make full use of your study week,you still have plenty!! Study superhard and supersmart yeah (+_+)

Usaha + doa + tawakkal = insyaAllah tak sia-sia (9_9)

Since I have no exam this sem, I wish you all:

Break a leg!!!

p/s: to be honest, SWOT VAC is the only week that I feel like I'm a true medical student. (I know very, very little in other 51 weeks huhu=S )

mahu setulusnya....

2009-10-14T16:09:00.000+11:00

AKU INGIN MENCINTAIMU...

Tuhan betapa aku malu

atas semua yang kau beri

padahal diriku terlalu sering

membuatMu kecewa

entah mungkin kerna ku terlena

sementara Engkau beri aku kesempatan

berulang kali

agar aku kembali

dalam fitrahku sebagai manusia

untuk menghambakanMu
betapa tak ada apa-apanya

aku dihadapanMu

aku ingin mencintaiMu setulusnya

sebenar-benar aku cinta
dalam do'a dalam ucapan

dalam setiap langkahku

aku ingin mendekatiMu selamanya
sehina apapun diriku
kuberharap untuk bertemu denganMu
ya RABBI

sakit

2009-10-13T23:01:00.001+11:00

sakit?

kenapa ada orang yg sakit?
kenapa ade yg tidak?

adakah ianya satu balasan kerana terlalu leka dgn hal duniawi?
adakah ianya satu ujian daripada Allah untuk menguji hambaNya?
adakah ianya satu kifarah kepada dosa-dosa yang telah dilakukan?
atau adakah ianya satu takdir yang dah tertulis di Luh Mahfuz?

Mungkin jawapannya YA kepada sume sekali
atau mungkin tidak?
Hanya Dia yang Maha Mengetahui..

Jadi gunakanlah waktu sihat kita sebaik mungkin sebelum tibanya waktu sakit~!.

Muhasabah Cinta

Wahai pemilik nyawaku
Betapa lemah diriku ini
Berat ujian dari-Mu
Ku pasrahkan semua pada-Mu

Tuhan baru ku sadar
Indah nikmat sehat itu
Tak pandai aku bersyukur
Kini ku harapkan cinta-Mu

Kata-kata cinta terucap indah
Mengalir berzikir di kidung doaku
Sakit yang ku rasa biar jadi penawar dosaku
Butir-butir cinta air mataku
Teringat semua yang Kau beri untukku
Ampuni khilaf dan salah selama ini
Ya Illahi
Muhasabah cintaku

Tuhan kuatkan aku
Lindungiku dari putus asa
Jika ku harus mati
Pertemukan aku dengan-Mu

Kata-kata cinta terucap indah
Mengalir berzikir di kidung doaku
Sakit yang ku rasa biar jadi penawar dosaku
Butir-butir cinta air mataku
Teringat semua yang Kau beri untukku
Ampuni khilaf dan salah selama ini
Ya Illahi
Muhasabah cintaku

p/s: sebak bila dengar lagu ni
bila dah lalui sendiri, pasti aku akan lebih mengerti...

WPP forever

2009-10-13T00:47:00.000+11:00

Haha, just like me~!

yeah, I really need to get my stuff done now!
(*_*)

bukan senang

2009-10-10T16:30:00.001+11:00

bila soalan diajukan kpada anak-anak kecil, "apa kamu semua nak jadi bila besar nti ye?"

banyak tangan yang mula berada diawang-awangan
dan berbagai-bagai jawapan pon bergema
"saya nak jadi lawyer, cikgu!"
"saya nak jadi arkitek!"
"saya nak jadi engineer!"
"saya nak jadi guru!"
"saya nak jadi polis!"
"saya nak jadi bomba!"
"saya nak jadi angkasawan!"
"saya nak jadi pilot!"

macam-macam pekerjaan la, semuanya keluar dari bibir mereka
aku teringat
jawapan aku pada masa tu
"saya nak jadi doktor, cikgu!"
sambil kawan lain mencelah,
"saya pun"
"saya jugak"

kenangan tu dah lama berlalu
15 tahun yang lepas agaknya
sekarang aku dah pon hampir separuh perjalanan dalam bidang yang aku pilih
nak cakap menyesal, oh tidak sama sekali
nak cakap enjoy, no komen la
nak cakap terseksa, xde lah!
susah nak ckp

hingga ke hari ni

10.10.09
Etika Pengamal Perubatan Islam
Dewan Malaysia Melbourne
Victoria

bila dengar Dr Mohamed Hatta Mohamed Tarmizi
bacakan ikrar doktor muslim
baru aku tersedar dan terpikir
mmg bukan senang nak menempatkan diri sbg medical student
mmg bukan senang juga nak bergelar seorg doktor
apatah lagi nk jd pakar
up lagi utk buat sub-specialist

Mmg sumenya susah, xsenang
tapi perjuangan x selesai setakat situ sahaja
ada yang lebih sukar
iaitu
untuk memikul dan menjaga amanah yang diberi sebaik mungkin
sebagai seorang doktor muslim
mmg bukan senang~

mungkin budak2 medik dah biasa baca Hippocratic Oath
sekali baca, ikrar doktor muslim ni (dari Dokumen Kuwait)
lebih kurang sama je isinya
tapi bg aku
ianya lebih terkesan di hati
ianya lebih bermakna
hayatilah

بِسْمِ اللّهِ الرَّحْمَنِ الرَّحِيمِ

Saya bersumpah demi Allah yang Agung

Bahawa saya akan mengingati Allah dalam menjalankan tugas saya

Bahawa saya akan melindungi nyawa manusia disemua peringkat dan di dalam semua keadaan, melakukan dengan seberapa daya saya untuk menyelamatkannya dari maut, penyakit, kesakitan dan kegelisahan

Bahawa saye akan menjaga kehormatan semua orang, melindungi perkara-perkara peribadi dan mengunci rahsia mereka

Bahawa saya akan sepanjang mase memperhambakan diri kepada belas kasihan Allah, memberikan khidmat perubatan saya kepada yang dekat dan yang jauh, yang baik dan yang berdosa serta kawan dan lawan

Bahawa saya akan berusaha di dalam mengejar pengetahuan dan menggunakannya untuk manfaat dan bukan untuk merosakkan manusia

Bahawa saya akan menghormati guru saya, mengajar doktor di bawah saya dan menjadi saudara kepada pengamal perubatan lain dan bekerjasama di dalam semangat ketaqwaan dan kebajikan

Bahawa saya akan menghidupkan keimanan saya semasa berseorangan atau di khalayak ramai, mengelakkan perkara yang boleh mencemarkan saya pada pandangan Allah, RasulNya dan orang beriman

Semoga Allah menjadi saksi kepada ikrar ini

aku sedar
ianya bukan senang!
InsyaAllah, jika tiada aral melintang
tanggungjawab yg bakal dipikul teramat besar
moga diperbetulkan segala niat kami semua
dan beroleh kejayaan
di dunia & akhirat
amin~

(,") TQ

2009-10-08T18:43:00.001+11:00

Assalamualaikum wbt...

Harini dah masuk 20 Syawal 1430H klo xsilap la,
so sementara ade beberapa hari je yg tinggal lagi ni,
aku nk mengucapkan berbanyak terima kasih
kepada yang menghantar kad raya =)

Sekurang-kurangnya kehadiran kad-kad raya ni
sedikit sebanyak meriangkan hatiku :D
Terima kasih byk2, pemberian anda amat dihargai!

Sebagai tanda penghargaan,
aku letakkan kad2 korg dgn tandangan sekali kat blog ni.
TERIMA KASIH

Kad ni dari adikku yg tersayang, siap bagi duit raya lagi
(^_^)

Dari kawanku yg baik hati.
Selamat menempuh alam pekerjaan
(9_6)

Ni pula baru je sampai ari ni
Dari sahabat WPP ku =))))
(masih ingat, mane leh lupa WPP kita)

Apesal kad ko same ngan adik aku eh??
Terkejut tgk (=_=)

And thanks juga pada mesej2, email, e-card dan sebagainya

Kepada yg dah berjanji nk bg kad tu, tunai2 kan lah janji anda
ade lagi 10 hari ni
(,") hehe ....

This is ME

2009-10-07T19:27:00.001+11:00

-THIS IS ME-
Demi Lovato

I've always been the kind of girl
That hid my face
So afraid to tell the world
What I've got to say

But I have this dream
Right inside of me
I'm gonna let it show, it's time
To let you know
To let you know

This is real, this is me
I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, now
Gonna let the light, shine on me
Now I've found, who I am
There's no way to hold it in
No more hiding who I want to be
This is me

Do you know what it's like
To feel so in the dark
To dream about a life
Where you're the shining star
Even though it seems
Like it's too far away
I have to believe in myself
It's the only way

This is real, This is me
I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, now
Gonna let the light, shine on me
Now I've found, who I am
There's no way to hold it in
No more hiding who I want to be
This is me

You're the voice I hear inside my head
The reason that I'm singin'
I need to find you
I gotta find you

You're the missin' piece I need
The song inside of me
I need to find you
I gotta find you

This is me... This is me..

You're the missing piece I need
The song inside of me

You're the voice I hear
Inside my head
The reason that I'm singin'

There's no way to hold it in
No more hiding who I want to be

This is me

choose!

2009-10-05T00:51:00.000+11:00

"With everything that has happened to you, you can either feel sorry for yourself or treat what has happened as a gift. Everything is either an opportunity to grow or an obstacle to keep you from growing. You get to choose."

Wayne Dyer

aku ingin jadi sepertimu

2009-10-01T01:12:00.000+10:00

aku terlalu ingin

jadi sepertimu

kuning warnamu

benar-benar menceriakan

indahnya dirimu

pasti mengukir senyuman setiap yang memandang

aku terlalu ingin jadi sepertimu

yang tidak pernah mengenal erti putus asa

sentiasa tampil tegak berdiri

tegar menahan panahan sang mentari

aku terlalu ingin jadi sepertimu

yang sentiasa tetap pada yang esa

sering sang angin menggugat keutuhanmu

namun wajahmu hanya pada dia

aku terlalu ingin jadi sepertimu

yang hidupnya

mahupun matinya

sentiasa memberi manfaat kepada semua

"diri ini

benar-benar ingin sepertimu"

* cane nak tanam bunga ni ye?
susah ke?

I.M.P.O.S.S.I.B.L.E

2009-09-30T00:01:00.000+10:00

NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE
THE WORD ITSELF SAYS

I'M POSSIBLE

*Audrey Hepburn*

('_')

Literature Review

2009-09-29T21:18:00.001+10:00

L.I.T.E.R.A.T.U.R.E

R.E.V.I.E.W

Nape la my Lit Review xsiap2!!
pikir punya pikir,

here are several reasons:

L - lacking idea
I - inadequate knowledge
T - time consuming
E - employment? yeke ;P
R - resting all day
A - apathetic
T - take it easy manner
U - unconcerned, uninterested.
R - relaxing dulu
E - endless job, xkan hbs pon

R - room syndrome "sleeping"
E - eating syndrome --> laziness
V - vicious task :P
I - indifferent
E - everlasting honey-moon year
W - wanna help, anyone?

N0 pressure, so relax lu
but at the end, sure cam lipas kudung

haha
(merapu meghaban)